We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
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