I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
