you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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