Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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