The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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