haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
