What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize