from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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