hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
