Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Randomize
