I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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