i don't like sucking hair
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize