That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
