They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
