A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I want to make a zoo with you.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize