Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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