He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
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