I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Randomize
