All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
