How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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