You can't motorboat a personality
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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