As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
