I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
