he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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