please come you make the beer taste better
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
