I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
