Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize