I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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