# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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