I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
