I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize