Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
