Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Randomize
