i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
