She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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