new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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