Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
