I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
