Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize