Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
