i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
