I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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