I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
