her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
