It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize