oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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