2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize