She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
