I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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