you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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