I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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