I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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